Department of Non-Sequiturs and No-Brainer Affairs

Caption: Above top, the 46th Vice President of the United States, Richard B.("Dick") Cheney; above bottom, Vice President Cheney's dog, Erwin Rommel

Bush: U.S. Doesn't Torture Prisoners

October 27 - Associated Press

President Bush said Friday the United States does not torture prisoners, commenting after Vice President Dick Cheney embraced the suggestion that a dunk in water might be useful to get terrorist suspects to talk.

Human rights groups complained that Cheney's words amounted to an endorsement of a torture technique known as "water boarding," in which the victim believes he is about to drown. The White House insisted Cheney was not talking about water boarding, but would not explain what he meant.

Cheney triggered the flap in an interview Tuesday by radio broadcaster Scott Hennen of WDAY in Fargo, N.D. Hennen said callers had told him, "Please, let the vice president know that if it takes dunking a terrorist in water, we're all for it, if it saves lives."

"Would you agree a dunk in water is a no-brainer if it can save lives?" Hennen asked. "Well, it's a no-brainer for me, but for a while there I was criticized as being the vice president for torture," Cheney said. "We don't torture. That's not what we're involved in."

At his photo op, Bush said, "This country doesn't torture, we're not going to torture. We will interrogate people we pick up off the battlefield to determine whether or not they've got information that will be helpful to protect the country."

Larry Cox, executive director of Amnesty International USA, said in a statement, "What's really a no-brainer is that no U.S. official, much less a vice president, should champion torture. Vice President Cheney's advocacy of water boarding sets a new human rights low at a time when human rights is already scraping the bottom of the Bush administration barrel."

Human Rights Watch said Cheney's remarks were "the Bush administration's first clear endorsement" of water boarding.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

OK, guys, don't get so excited! Mr Cheney probably was not referring to the water-boarding interrogation method but some other water sport known by the same name. The fact that the context of the call-in was interrogation methods has nothing to do here: Mr Cheney was thinking not interrogation methods, but perhaps water sports. In any case, why bother about the rights of some suspected terrorist? Well, because, one day, this might be you. You just did not shave for a couple of days before your vacation trip to Morocco and - bingo! - you are arrested at JFK and questioned about your links to Osama bin Laden. You keep insisting it's got to be a huge mistake but, no matter what, you are taken to the water-boarding department. You have no rights (terrorists have no rights, remember?) and thus no attorney. The rest is history. BYE BYE.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *